For years I have experimented on my body. I was one of the lucky ones who refuse to believe everything they are told to believe. Whenever there is a contradiction, I will explore.
Thus is the case with Cannabis. From the age of 12 I suffered from migraines. Back then it just meant time off from school and a dark room with silence. At 15, at the same time I was diagnosed with depression, I was introduced to Marijuana (as most teenagers are). Mind you, this was during the time of Nancy Reagan's "Just Say No" campaign and everyone was frothing at the mouth to convict someone. All "Drug Awareness Education" was based on this model.
Marijuana was NOTHING they said it was. In fact, it made me feel a helluva lot better. And not just while "high". I noticed I no longer experienced intense migraines. I was better able to function in social situations (my earliest memories are of social anxiety). From that moment on I learned that one must discern for themselves reality from fiction.
Although, due to social and political pressure, stopped using the herb (intermittently).
That is how I've spent my life. In my early 30's I was in a car accident that even my doctor at the time didn't believe until I showed him the Police Report. And everything I said, he counteracted as "imaginary". That has been what I'd gotten all my life everytime I expressed a concern to a doctor. But they've, nevertheless, been more than willing to give me a pill for it. All of which with side effects as bad or exacerbating the original problem. I was discouraged with traditional medicine. At a time when I needed, at the very least, real advise. I began making strides, once again and on my own, with Marijuana.
That is, until I was having, once again, problems with social anxiety (which the accident had made out of control). At this time someone suggested I tried something they had to get me through the night at a party. I did and spent the next 3 years addicted to Meth. It helped with all my pain and social dilemmas. The side effects, however, were far worse than anything it helped. So began my 2 month ordeal with me on the couch. Coming out of my addiction I'd sought a spiritual connection to the rest of the world. Strangely (so, I thought) this led me once again to Marijuana. Using it and analyzing the various responses (especially in relation to various strains) I SAW the benefits this was doing for me. WHY on earth are people not allowed to learn the truth? WHY are people so resistant?
After Meth I was put on Effexor (after all other anti-depressants failed to work). Once again, the side effects put into question the very use of the drug. But it (sort of) helps. Although, it helps only because it (sort of) makes me feel like I'm on Meth only without the twitchy-ness. And trust me, going off of it is just as painful.
So here we are at day one of beginning my quest for living the life I should have every right to live. Oh, well, I'm willing to jump through the hoops to just be left alone. After speaking with Angel Kare Alliance at this years HempFest, I've contacted the doctor they referred me to (to see if I'm an "acceptable candidate" for a license to be granted the right to use Marijuana). We will see where this goes...
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